New Here

[valley]

Hi, I don't know if I really fit in here since I was never really in this lifestyle. However that was only by the grace of God. if I had had my way we would have been. Ironically it was my husband who was not interested in getting into some whole "thing". I have come to realize that he has the controlling traits (not "leadership" there is a difference IMO) and that it's a big problem in our family. That's pretty much where I am right now, just beginning to see things and wonder what if anything there is to do about it. I found this site by chance and have learned a lot from reading here. Thanks

[nikita]

Welcome to the forums, Valley. It sounds like you are in exactly the right place.

We are all from different backgrounds and levels of suckitude when it comes to abusive or controlling religious (and often familial) situations.

Listening to the different stories here is kind of like putting on a coat that isn't mine but still fits way too perfectly, you know what I mean? It wasn't exactly my life, but it was very much my life anyway. I was in a cult for sixteen years and could totally see myself falling into the quiverfull and survivalist type lifestyle although I'm much too independent and stubborn to follow that into actual patriarchy. I never could manage to do what I was told and follow the party line, so I can't see me going there. We'll never know because it didn't become as widespread until after I left the cult so it was never presented to me as an option. And my husband doesn't like to do anything that isn't 'fun' and is completely non-religious since about 1985 so I am certain he'd never have gone for it. So in that sense I am like you, I was prevented from falling down that particular rabbit hole quite in spite of myself. Thank goodness. I just fell down a slightly different one instead.

Anyway, I'm very glad to have you here with us.