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Post by AustinAvery on May 6, 2009 14:07:58 GMT -5
Hello all:
Here is my story vis-a-vis this site.
I procrastinate at work, terribly. One afternoon, surfing AlterNet, one of the many political news and commentary sites at which I spend all too much time, I saw an interesting article about fundamentalism. After reading the article, I went to the comments section below, my favorite part of any article, and there was a post by a fundamentalist, ostensibly anyway, who was questioning his/her faith.
O.K., to me, that was like catnip. A fundamentalist who had come to the light of reason and rationality, who had come to see the world of religious belief as, well, as I did (hey, we all think we're more or less right, don't we). I had to know more. Reading all of the comments back and fourth (some welcoming the newcomer to the land of those who question, others telling the poster s/he simply didn't read the right parts of the bible, etc.), I began to think I was being had by a troll. While the Religious Right was crumbling as an influence on the national stage, here was a fundamentalist claiming a parallel lose of faith. The poster had to be a plant, and I said so in a reply.
Au contraire, she responded and gave me an email site to contact her directly, away from a public comments section, where I went . . . and met Vyckie--in a cyber sort of way.
I kept in touch with her through email for awhile, but lost touch, and then stumbled across her again just before the Quivering article appeared in Salon.
I will be the first to admit that I have nothing in my background that allows me to empathize--sympathize yes, but empathize no--with the experiences of many of those on this site. My sympathy comes, I thing, from that fact that I have been strongly shaped in my beliefs and views by my mother--who is a feminist, an atheist, and an extremely intelligent person (PhD in linguistics for example). Nevertheless, religion as a tool of oppression fascinates me, and I find this site compelling--and particularly hard to resist when I should be busy working. Did I say I procrastinate a lot?
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Post by jemand on May 6, 2009 15:45:58 GMT -5
Welcome to the boards
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Post by krwordgazer on May 8, 2009 17:51:40 GMT -5
That's an interesting story, Austinavery. Welcome.
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Post by Vyckie D. Garrison on May 9, 2009 0:20:34 GMT -5
Hey austinavery ~ do you recognize this: Your comment at Alter Net is moving, but I'm skeptical by nature (so much of what I've been told in life turns out not to be true). Is your story real?That was the first note you sent me after reading my Alternet comment (which, btw, I wrote in the hopes of finding a substitute for my uncle Ron). I responded with a brief(ish) explanation of how I'd lost my fundamentalist faith in the Christian God due to the correspondence with Ron ~ and here's part of what you wrote in the second note: I'm flabbergasted. I kept reading your lengthy response looking for something to convince me that it was made up, that some very dedicated "troll" (I assume you are familar with the concept of trolls on the web) was pulling my leg. But what you write seems genuine. So, if you're a troll, you're a damn good one, and you've suckered me in. Now, for the sake of argument, let's assume you're for real. My heart breaks for you. I neither judge nor condemn anything that you have done (or said that you have done). I suspect you will likely not find my suspension of judgment surprising when I tell you that I, too, am a Unitarian Universalilst. But back to you. The old saying, "how do you keep 'em down on the farm once they've seen the lights of the city" comes to mind. How can you, ..., stay in both worlds? Your story throws the graphic relief of the lives of real people over so much of what I believe. Some philosopher (I can't remember which, my education in the classics is weaker than I'd like it to be) said that the unexamined life is not worth living--or words to that effect. I've always believed that--unquestioningly. Yet there you are as someone who has exploded upon the EXAMINED life, and look what it has done to the life you now have to navigate day to day. Would it be better for your happiness for you to remain ignorant? My intellect screams "no," but my heart wonders, "maybe." ... the religion thing aside, here is what worries me about you. Based upon what you have written, it appears to me that you are one of those people who live what my mother calls "the life of the mind." Whether by some unexplained part of your upbringing, or as I believe lucky genes, you are attracted to ideas. I theorize (without good scientific evidence to back it up as yet) that some people's minds just operate better in the world of ideas, what you call being "intellectual." My (admittedly limited) understanding of fundamentalists is that they see the world as a set of "knowns." They know the answer, and thinking is only about the process of verfying what they already know. "Intellectuals", or those who live the life of the mind, see truth as ever ellusive, but always worth persuing, so thinking is about the task of asking questions and seeking the answer--and for those so inclined--such as you, and I like to think me, too--that task is very enjoyable. How can you, now that you have experienced what the life of the mind is like, ever go back to not living and thinking this way--not being, to use your term, an intellectual? I don't think you can. I know I couldn't. And so, knowing the world that surrounds you, I'm worried. I wish I had an answer, but even if I did, I couldn't give it to you. You and I both know only you can find it. But my hope is with you! I really appreciated your concern ~ because you seemed to actually understand my predicament back then ~ and it was encouraging that you didn't throw up your hands and declare the situation hopeless. Truth surely is stranger than fiction, huh? LOL As far as your comment: Yet there you are as someone who has exploded upon the EXAMINED life, and look what it has done to the life you now have to navigate day to day. Would it be better for your happiness for you to remain ignorant? My intellect screams "no," but my heart wonders, "maybe" ~ it really makes me want to skip ahead in my story to the part in which Ron and I talked about Dostoevsky's Grand Inquisitor ~ but I'll control myself for now ... yes, I will. ;D
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Post by AustinAvery on May 12, 2009 13:10:12 GMT -5
Vickey, Wow, I had forgotten all of that. Truth be told--and why not--I had hoped at the time that you would do what, in fact, you have done. Break away, not so much from Warren, I would have liked for him to see the light too (pun unavoidable) and follow you. But to emerge from the fundamentalist, paternalistic cocoon that stifled you, to become the intellectual butterfly (I know, its a chrysalis) that you are now, stretching her wings so to speak. It seemed too cruel to suggest that at the time, though, given your situation then. But look at you now. All of this, the blog, your emancipation, your new life, is truly inspiring. I keep checking in periodically waiting to see what the next chapter brings. Coming from a balding, white, geek of a male, this will sound practically ridiculous, but no other words suffice . . . you go, girl!
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Post by philosophia on May 31, 2009 12:30:50 GMT -5
austinavery, Your attitude and thoughtful conversations with Vyckie probably had much more positive impact on both Vyckie's self worth and her thought process than she can express. My father and an old school friend, both agnostic, recognized that while I was an otherwise very thoughtful and intelligent idea person, I was caught in a pattern of thinking that they could not understand. Putting my reasons for accepting the mistreatment into words actually forced me to see how I had been trapped in a thought process that was illogical and unreasonable. So perhaps you were Vyckie's Socrates!
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Post by AustinAvery on Jun 1, 2009 11:06:58 GMT -5
philosophia, Thank you! That's the nicest thing anyone has said about me in a very long time. I can't say I intended to lead Vyckie's thinking one direction or another, but I'm very pleased for her that it has all worked out quite well and that I played some part, however minor. Now, having said that, I do fancy my self a Socratic force in the lives of my children. They, of course, think I've discovered a fancy way to be annoying. So I'll take any kudos I can get.
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