margybargy

[margybargy]

Hello. I've been lurking for a few months. Vyckie, your story is amazing. You are so honest and courageous. Same goes for all the ladies who've posted their stories. This blog is an eye-opener to say the least.

About me. I'd describe my religious status as "raised Catholic, born Atheist". It's more complicated then that, of course. Basically, I was never truly convinced, in spite of all the Sunday school and so forth. I always thought there was something wrong with me. I was always very half-hearted about religion because it just didn't make sense. My husband comes from a fundie background, so after we got married, I gave religion another try. I read the Bible all the way through twice. I came away thinking if that's the basis for Christianity, then it's all pretty weak. Anyway, I lost all semblance of belief and became an atheist. Just acknowledging my true feelings to myself was such a relief.

By the way, I know that the previous paragraph may be offensive to some. That's not my intention. I'm just describing my own experience.

I don't expect to post a whole lot, but want to let you know you've got another fan out there.

[xara]

Welcome to the forum margybargy.

[jemand]

welcome!

How does your husband feel about your current beliefs? Especially after I came here, I've been thanking the stars or whatever that I deconverted *without* getting married first.

[alwayslearning]

Welcome!

Since leaving religion, I've become a bit envious of those equipped enough to withstand being sucked in in the first place. I was one of the many vulnerable ones who took the long road.

[margybargy]

Thanks for the welcome.

Jemand said:
How does your husband feel about your current beliefs? Especially after I came here, I've been thanking the stars or whatever that I deconverted *without* getting married first.

It can be awkward sometimes. Fortunately, our differences are far outweighed by what we have in common. Plus at heart, he's a practical, logical, level-headed, compassionate, decent guy. He doesn't seem to think through the implications of the beliefs held by the church he attends. I think he just likes being part of community of "upstanding citizens". I think most of us here know church attendance is no indication good character, but for him it's a kind of short-hand, I guess.

When we met we were both kind of indifferent about religion. As a result, its not like I'm really rocking the boat here. I just went from indifferent to completely unconvinced.

And you are right, it's much easier to have this stuff figured out before you get married.

alwayslearning said:
Since leaving religion, I've become a bit envious of those equipped enough to withstand being sucked in in the first place. I was one of the many vulnerable ones who took the long road.

Well, I had a lot going for me. My mother never would have described herself as a feminist. However, she did not marry and start having kids until her late thirties. This was in the 60s, so she was way ahead of her time. She encouraged me and my sister to get our education and establish careers before getting married. I think that allowed us the kind of life experience that gives a person the breathing room to ask questions they might not otherwise have the opportunity to ask.

Also, my Dad was never much of church-goer, and he loves to make inflammatory (but hilarious and sometimes accurate) religious jokes. I think that kept me from taking it all too seriously.

The important thing is that you get to where you have a belief system that works for you and not the other way around.

[tapati]

The important thing is that you get to where you have a belief system that works for you and not the other way around.

Amen!

Welcome, margybargy! And thanks for the kind words about sharing our stories.

[catlady2323]

Hello,

I had to laugh when you said

"... I read the Bible all the way through twice. I came away thinking if that's the basis for Christianity, then it's all pretty weak. "

When I am asked how I became an atheist, after being a devout evangelical, fundamentalist Christian for 3 decades, I reply that the Bible talked me out of being a Christian.

I had read and studied the Bible as a devotee for decades, when finally I asked myself a simple question: Is it possible that the Bible was written by men (not God) for the benefit of those men? I posted an article summarizing my conclusions at exchristian.net/testimonies/2008/12/once-you-know-something-you-cant-un.html

Appreciated reading your post.

[margybargy]

I love exchristian.net. I've never posted my extimony there because its so non-dramatic. I'm going to go read your article right now.

ETA: Read it. So true. I liked the bit about Adam and Eve.